Tuesday, February 14, 2006


I’ve been bothered by lung congestion for years. Whenever I visited a doctor (perhaps half a dozen times in the past two decades) I mentioned it. The doctor would only give me a blank stare. A nurse asked me what color was the mucus. I wondered if she wanted to draw a picture of it.

How the hell would I know what color it was? It was in my goddamned lungs. (No, I didn’t swear in the doctor’s office.)

Anyway I got no help from them.

Then I caught this head cold that my dumb kids brought home from school. Of course I didn’t go to a doctor. (Although medical help is pretty good and very inexpensive here in Bangkok.) Doctors are for pussies. (Hey! That will look great on my headstone, “DOCTORS ARE FOR PUSSIES.”) Also, you know what you find in doctor’s offices and in hospitals? Sick people, that’s what you find. I don’t like to be around sick people. Being around my dumb kids is enough risk.

The Jungle Princess brought home some nose drops and an inhalant from our friendly, local 7-11. (They are everywhere in Bangkok.)

To make a long story short, the inhalant (Vapex) cleared up 90% of the lung congestion. It didn’t cure it. I have to use the inhalant several times a day, but the symptoms are gone!

What a simple solution.

Why the hell couldn’t the doctors have told me that?

I don’t think they approve of simple, inexpensive, non-prescription remedies.


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