LAURA INGRAHAM AND DON IMUS

She’s a funny lady. I was a regular listener when I could find her on the dial. I wish her a long, healthy life.

Funny thing is, I found her first on the Don Imus Show. She did a bit on TV, outside the studio, playing an airhead blonde in a car, that was hilarious. (Imus was simulcast on radio and TV.)

So what was she doing on the Imus Show? He almost never has conservative commentators on that show.

I once challenged him to be a man and stand up and say what his politics were. So, being Imus, he stood up and lied. He announced to the world that he was a Republican. That, of course, was playing to the majority of his relatively small audience.

He then tried to explain why all the commentators on his program were liberal by saying all his friends were liberal. Right. And then he just happened to vote for Kerry. Talk about no balls!

So what was Laura Ingraham doing on that show? It might have been a contractual thing. They both had shows that were struggling on MSNBC at the time and were co-promoting.

She was very good, very funny, and very effective on the show. There was some humorous give and take between her and Imus. I think the problem was, she was too good and too conservative.

After a lot of teasing back and forth over weeks, Imus chose to be offended when she said he looked like a girl swinging a golf club. He, just like a girl, threw a snit fit and banned her from the show. As I said, she was too good and too conservative. She would pretty much destroy all the arguments of the liberals that he loved so much.

Now she is recovering from an operation for breast cancer. I wish her well. I wish her a complete recovery and a long, healthy, happy life.

I must point out though, she is part of the lunatic fringe of the Republican party. When the FCC began their gangster-like suppression of free speech, she came down squarely on the side of repression and Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson. Those are the people who will eventually put the liberals back in power. They are overreaching even as we speak.

She is getting married. Good for her. Everyone should get married a few times. It builds character and helps to distribute the wealth.

I must confess, I have often imagined her sex life. In my imagination, it involves black leather and whips.

No, no. Nothing to do with me. I don’t go that way. Forget that.

But you want a laugh? Picture her in black leather with assorted whips. And the object of the whipping is Don Imus!

Now that there’s funny!